You Are Accepted!

The Lord your God in your midst,
the Mighty One, will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
he will rejoice over you with singing.

Zephaniah 3:17

As a Human we are all looking to be accepted. As a mother we often lose our identity in what we do. I know that I have found as a Stay At Home Mother I often feel I lose myself in what I do during the day. I see my self as Tyler & Nathan's mother. A pet owner of Brutis the dog, Simba the cat and Fluffy the hamster. A wife of Brian. A Daughter of Karen and Gary. These are not bad things, just realities. And these are not bad realities.

Every day I wear many hats, and every mother out there knows of the different hats we are required to wear every day. Any given day I am a mother, doctor, chef, nanny, judge, driver, wife, maid, mediator, supporter, friend, sister, aunt, granddaughter, daughter-in-law, sister-in-law, and so much more. With all that we do on a daily basis it is easy to forget to just be ourselves.

Getting lost in all of our responsibilities is easily done, and feeling that we are accepted for who we are is just as difficult. That is why it is so important to remember one thing, that we are loved and accepted for who we are, and nothing more. God loves us, the core of us. He expects nothing of us, except for being ourselves.

So often we feel we have to be something we are not to be accepted, but God accepts us and loves us for who we are. We don't have to pretend, we don't have to do anything more than be out selves and he loves us, and always has. Even with any of the negative things we have done. Even when we have turned away from him, he still loves and accepts us.

So the next time you are down, or just have a bad day. The next time you feel that you have nowhere to turn or that you are alone. When you feel the world is against you, it is important to remember you have one, very important person who just accepts you, for all of your flaws, in all of your hard time, and that is God!

Remember that God accepts and deeply loves you, just as you are right at this very moment! When you are insecure and scared, remember this and feel secure in the love God has for you!

How Much Is Too Much

Those who trust in riches will be ruined, but a good person will be healthy like a green leaf

Proverbs 11:28

As a mother we want to give everything to our children.  I have found in my life that giving everything to my children is more technology and possession based.  It is amazing how quickly we come to rely on possessions for just about everything.

I know that I am guilty of this.  It seems that I get one thing and want more and more.  Nothing seems to satisfy me, or make me feel as if I have achieved my goals.  I see something new advertised and I want it.  I feel a need driven to have it.  

When I am able to get this object that I want to so bad it feels great at first, but that feeling is a novelty that wears off.  To feel good I need to purchase more and more.  This is not a good feeling at all.  It leave me feeling empty when all is said and done.

Learning not to trust in the possessions that are around us is one of the hardest lessons that one can learn.  This is a lesson that, once it is learned so many wonderful feelings and emotions fill your heart.  Learning that you do not need to purchase things, but to rely on what you have and the wonders that God give you is one of the important jobs we can do. 

As a mother this is one of the lessons that not only do I need to learn for myself but I also want to learn so I can pass it along to my children.  Having my children learn how to trust to God for happiness will be the best and most important lesson as a mother I can teach them.

Being thankful for the little things

This past weekend My DH and DS1 went out of town to visit my MIL and FIL, so I had the house to myself with DS2.  It was a wonderful weekend to spend one on one time with him.  Having the time or the ability to spend one on one time with DS2 is often difficult because he is quiet and like to play by himself where DS1 is always up in my face and talking to me and getting my attention.

It was so nice to concentrate on one child and remember what it was like.  Looking back I used to think that it was difficult to do anything with one child.  Now I see that I was wrong.  With only one child I was easily able to clean my house, and do my laundry.  The entire weekend, other than the toys he was playing with my house was clean.

I am so happy that DH and DS1 are home, but I have to admit that they came home and I feel I am back at square one with cleaning and getting my house back in shape.  It is a hard feeling, because I have some cleaning I do on a daily basis but I just have the added stress of unpacking and organizing everything that they had taken with them.

At first I was put off by this thought that I am going to have to start over.  But then I realize that it is not going to be bad.  The key is first to getting organized and second to know that everything will be ok.  These little things that seem to get me down, are part of my job.  These little things are important because they are helping my family.  I am going to start changing the way I am thinking. 

My goal is when live gets me down, and when I feel that I am overwhelmed by the little tasks that I need to do on a daily basis, to stop and pray.  First to be thankful that I have these little tasks to do.  Second pray that through these tasks my eyes will be open to all of the things that God has in store for me.

It is important to remember that God has little tasks for you to do everyday.  Some of these tasks can be frustrating, but knowing that they are important is a good thing.  Some of the tasks can be tasks that you don't like, but taking the time to thank God for the ability to do these things will make them so much easier.

Choosing the way to live your life

Over the past couple months I have looked at the way I have lived my life.  The one thing that I have seen is that I am just not happy.  I have noticed that the best time in my life and the times that I am the most confident is when I have lived my life in a way that I live out my faith.

I have noticed that I, like Peter have denied Jesus in my faith many times.  Not necessarily in my words, but more my actions.  By missing mass, or doing things to become part of the in crowd, even though there is a gut feeling that it is just not the road I should be taking.

It is difficult to think that this is the way that I want to live my life.  The hardest times, the times of hardship and the times of doubt.  The times of pain are the times that I have not lived in a manor that I see fitting, a manor that I find to fit within my faith.

In the past I have felt that people would judge me and people would not want to get to know me because of my faith.  I have chosen the road that is highly traveled.  The road that would, in my opinion, win me friends.  The problem with this road is the fact that it is a road that leads to hurt and leads to pain.  It is a road that does not allow me to truly and fully be myself.

I have hidden my faith and pushed back that part of me with the fear that people would see it and hate me, or judge me.  I would make decisions that was against my faith because I felt that it would be better for people to see me that way.

Now looking back I feel that those decisions made people doubt me.  It made my actions look fake and made people question me and what I was saying and what I was doing.  It made me look like a person that could not be trusted, and instead of making friends, it caused me to lose friends.

Now I want to embrace my faith, and the fact that God will allow me to do this is amazing.  I can go to confession and talk to a priest and know that I am forgiven, for I am truly sorry, and know that God still loves me and will guide me to living the live that I am meant to live.

I know that this is a life that will be hard, but I know that by making my decisions based on my faith and my love of Jesus will help me to make decisions to change my life, and help me to feel confident that I am going to be happy. 

I know that I can not change the past, but I have learned a awesome lesson, a lesson that will help me to change my life and live it the way that I want to live my life.  I can live my life in a way that I can make the best decisions that will change me and help me to grow in faith.

This is not the easiest change to make, but it is a change that will help me to be confident that I will find Jesus.  I feel confident that people will look at me and know that I am who I say I am and that My faith is so important to me

My Prayer Today

Today Lord I Pray for

My eyes to be open to see your great work

My ears to be ready to listen to your quiet whispers

My mouth to speak only words that will reflect my love of you

My heart to love all that you have given me in my life

 My hands to be ready to do your will

My soul to be child-like to trust that you are with me today.

Amen

Trusting the Vine of God

Yesterday while at mass I heard one of the most inspirational and moving sermons that I have ever heard.  This one was one that reached out and touched my heart, and was one that I can relate to all aspects of my life, and all goes back to having faith in God. 
I have always had faith in God, the problem that I have had was to be brave enough to share it with everyone.  The biggest fear that I have is the fear of being judged.  I also have had the issue of not always living my life in a way that God could be shown through, or even that I could be proud of.
A trip to Tennessee had shown me how God can change my life.  Seeing the work that he had done in a friend was the first important step I needed.  When you see someone on a different level and see the little seeds you know that God is at work.
Then it all came together yesterday at mass.  The parable came up of a woman walking through the woods and she hears a growl coming from behind her, so she turns around and finds Tigers.  She runs but finds herself at the edge of a cliff.  When she looks down she sees a vine, and starts to climb down.  As she is climbing she hears a growl from underneath her.  When she looks down she sees another pack of tigers.  She stops where she is but then starts hearing little scratching sounds from above and sees mice gnawing at the vine.  Faced with all of this she looks around and finds wild strawberries around her and chooses to take the moment to enjoy a strawberry.
I find myself in this situation so many times.  I have tried to scramble and throw strawberries up, or down.  Tried to scare the mice.  While it may work for a few minutes, the tigers and the mice always come back.  I have failed to do the one thing that is so important... trust in the vine.  I need to take the step back and learn how to trust in the vine and know that the strength of the vine is the strength that I need to live my life. 
Once you learn to trust in the vine that is when you will find the strawberries, and that the strawberries become more and more plentiful.  Seeing the strawberries, and then learning how to enjoy them is the key to learning how to live a life with Jesus and how to be completely happy.
I have challenged myself to start living my life.  I have challenged myself to stop trying to do what I think others want me to do.  I have challenged myself to stop being the person that I was and hated, and take that little light that I loved and start living that as my life.  Trusting in God, and knowing that he is there.  Trusting that during the times when I feel that I am going to fall, that God will be my strength.  Finding the tigers and the mice in my life and doing what I can to eliminate them if possible.  Knowing that there will always be tigers and mice, but knowing that my faith is what is needed to keep me strong.

Morning Changes With Jury Duty

Being a mother is not easy.  But being a stay at home mother I find being very difficult.  I have been blessed to be selected for Jury duty, and it has been a very different for me in the morning. 

My normal routine is nice.  I get up at 5:15am.  I get ready and go run at the gym, or do some sort of work out.  Then I come home and stretch and take on my morning with my children.  I take a shower after breakfast and then go play with my children.  Some where in the day I find the time to not only play with my children, but plan and fix dinner, clean the house do the laundry and go to the store when neccessary. 

I was then thrown a wrentch into my plan with having to get up early and do a completely different routine.  I did not want to give up my morning workouts, they are the biggest and best part of my day.  I start out with my work out, but get home and squeeze in some housework.  Then battle getting into a shower and getting my kids out of bed.

Getting ready for Jury duty is much like having to get out of the house if you are a working mother I have found.  It is not easy.  I can tell that mornings can be stressful.  I am so grateful that I am organized and made sure that I had everything I needed done before I went to bed.  I did not have to run around and find clothes or pack a lunch.

I love having some time to myself to get some things done.  It is nice to have the quiet that I am not used to, however it is boring to not have my children around.  I miss playing with them and going outside.  I take walks with my mother a couple of days a week, which are a wonderful way to connect with her and I have not been able to do that either.

I am also very surprised how tiring it is just sitting around all day.  I get home and I just don't want to do anything.  I was more tired my first day of sitting around than the days I get up work out, take my kids to the zoo and do things.

To me it is just amazing just how tired I am from just sitting around.  I miss my mornings of sitting and cuddling with my children.  I know that it is important to do what I am doing, and I pray that I will also get to experience the court room and a trial.