Learning To Deal

This past weekend I had an experience that I never thought I would have. My DH and I traveled to Toledo to visit his grandmother who is in Hospice. Walking in the doors, I was amazed how calming the building felt. The walls were beautiful. The paintings on the walls were perfect. As we walked down to her room, you felt a calmness.

Walking in for the first time, looking around and seeing everything was eye opening. For me watching her lay there in pain, not able to rest was so difficult. I did the only thing that I felt I could do, sit and hold her hand and start quietly in my head saying prayers. I moved from the Lord's Prayer and then on to the Hail Mary.

In between these prayers that I have been taught, I just asked for Jesus to be with her, to guide her and to help her during these times. I though of my favorite prayer, Footprints, and praying during this difficult time before death, that Jesus was carrying Grandma, helping her through the end of her suffering.

I had comfort when the nurses and the STNA's said that everything that was happening was all normal and part of the stages of death. It was a comfort, but still not easy to watch. I wanted to take her pain and let her be peaceful.

We are still waiting as of today, waiting to hear what was going to happen next. I pray for her to be comfortable, and that she is able to be welcomed into the glory of heaven. While I know that we will miss her and mourn for her, I will be comforted knowing that she is in the promised land with Jesus.

What's On Your Mind

Think about the things that are good and worthy of praise

Think about the things that are true and honorable

and right and pure and beautiful and respected.

Philippians 4:8

It is often very hard to be positive when others around you are being very negative.  Negativity grows quickly and spreads like wild fire from person to person.  Once you start feeling or being negative it often will consume your day, your thoughts and your actions.

Being positive, and loving is not so easily spread, it takes more time.  If you are feeling negative, or down, having loving and positive feelings overcome the negative feelings takes time and work.  The same is true with violence and anger, once you are over come with these feelings, finding happiness is not easily done.

That is why television is so powerful.  Violent shows can influence how other feel.  As a character takes on a feeling of being afraid or scared it is easy for the viewing audience to take on those feelings and start to own them.  When a character is angry it is easy to take the anger and allow it to overcome your life.

That is why it is important to know what we are thinking about and what we allow ourselves to be influenced by.  If we want the love of God to enter into our hearts, then we have to open them to him, and block the feelings of anger, hurt, sadness and other negative feelings that are around us.

When we want to grow in love, we have to be open to see all of the good and the positive that God has put into our lives and in our path.  Once we can do that we are truly opening our minds, hearts and souls to becoming vessels for God. 

Learning how to do this is not easy, however it is important to remember that as humans we are easily influenced with what is around us.  That is why choosing friends and choosing televisions shows to watch is so important.  Choosing wisely is the best way to open your hear to Jesus.

Angels Watching Over Me

He has put his angels in charge of you

to watch over you wherever you go.

They will catch you in their hands so that

you will not hit your food on a rock.

Psalm 91:11-12

I have noticed that lately I have been struggling, mainly because there are many times that I feel completely alone.  Being alone is a scary thought.  For me when I am left to myself I often find that being alone also means that my thoughts start to run away from me.  

Often times when I have a few minutes of quiet in my life I find that this quiet will be quickly filled with the thoughts that are racing through my head.  Having thoughts that start racing through my head confuses and often times changes my mood.

For me it is easy to read into the thoughts that go through my head.  They quickly take me from being in a good mood to being in a bad mood.  This is a feeling that is not good.  Knowing that something simple can have such an effect on me.  And this will lead me to believe that I am alone.

Thinking about Psalm 91 is a great reminder that we are never truly alone.  That we always have an Angel with us.  They are there to guide us.  When we are feeling alone, or our thoughts and worries get the best of us it is time to stop and consider changing directions. 

In those times why not take a step back and remember that we should trust in God and all that he has for us.  Trust that our Angel that is watching over us will help guide us through the rough times, and comfort us when we need to be comforted.

God never wants us to feel alone.  He always wants us know that he is here for us and that he loves us.  We know that with God we have the ability to achieve our goals.  He will assist us in finding the tools, hold our hands when we fail, and help us get back up and try it again.

The next time I feel alone, I am going to remember that I am never alone.  That I always have an Angel that God has sent to watch over me and guide me.  When I have too much on my mind, I am going to lift it up and have faith that everything will work out, just as God has planned

You Are Accepted!

The Lord your God in your midst,
the Mighty One, will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
he will rejoice over you with singing.

Zephaniah 3:17

As a Human we are all looking to be accepted. As a mother we often lose our identity in what we do. I know that I have found as a Stay At Home Mother I often feel I lose myself in what I do during the day. I see my self as Tyler & Nathan's mother. A pet owner of Brutis the dog, Simba the cat and Fluffy the hamster. A wife of Brian. A Daughter of Karen and Gary. These are not bad things, just realities. And these are not bad realities.

Every day I wear many hats, and every mother out there knows of the different hats we are required to wear every day. Any given day I am a mother, doctor, chef, nanny, judge, driver, wife, maid, mediator, supporter, friend, sister, aunt, granddaughter, daughter-in-law, sister-in-law, and so much more. With all that we do on a daily basis it is easy to forget to just be ourselves.

Getting lost in all of our responsibilities is easily done, and feeling that we are accepted for who we are is just as difficult. That is why it is so important to remember one thing, that we are loved and accepted for who we are, and nothing more. God loves us, the core of us. He expects nothing of us, except for being ourselves.

So often we feel we have to be something we are not to be accepted, but God accepts us and loves us for who we are. We don't have to pretend, we don't have to do anything more than be out selves and he loves us, and always has. Even with any of the negative things we have done. Even when we have turned away from him, he still loves and accepts us.

So the next time you are down, or just have a bad day. The next time you feel that you have nowhere to turn or that you are alone. When you feel the world is against you, it is important to remember you have one, very important person who just accepts you, for all of your flaws, in all of your hard time, and that is God!

Remember that God accepts and deeply loves you, just as you are right at this very moment! When you are insecure and scared, remember this and feel secure in the love God has for you!

How Much Is Too Much

Those who trust in riches will be ruined, but a good person will be healthy like a green leaf

Proverbs 11:28

As a mother we want to give everything to our children.  I have found in my life that giving everything to my children is more technology and possession based.  It is amazing how quickly we come to rely on possessions for just about everything.

I know that I am guilty of this.  It seems that I get one thing and want more and more.  Nothing seems to satisfy me, or make me feel as if I have achieved my goals.  I see something new advertised and I want it.  I feel a need driven to have it.  

When I am able to get this object that I want to so bad it feels great at first, but that feeling is a novelty that wears off.  To feel good I need to purchase more and more.  This is not a good feeling at all.  It leave me feeling empty when all is said and done.

Learning not to trust in the possessions that are around us is one of the hardest lessons that one can learn.  This is a lesson that, once it is learned so many wonderful feelings and emotions fill your heart.  Learning that you do not need to purchase things, but to rely on what you have and the wonders that God give you is one of the important jobs we can do. 

As a mother this is one of the lessons that not only do I need to learn for myself but I also want to learn so I can pass it along to my children.  Having my children learn how to trust to God for happiness will be the best and most important lesson as a mother I can teach them.